My Pathetic Thank You

I wonder if there is a right way – or a truly “proper” way to thank a person. Is there a better way of saying thank you than saying it in the most sincere and genuine way possible? If someone says thank you with an unfeigned, heartfelt and earnest heart, isn’t that enough? Isn’t being and feeling “thankful”, enough at all?

Dishonesty aside, my heart swells with gratitude whenever I say thank you. I sometimes tend to hold back real tears of joy and gratitude, too. But I take care not to seem like a cry-baby, otherwise, I might overdo it and kill the quintessence of being happy and thankful and grateful altogether.

When I say thank you, I mean it. I truly do mean it. Even if a person is a total stranger… I don’t withhold thanks if that person deserves it. Thank you’s are given where gratitude is due. Even the vilest of persons deserve a thank you if a certain act of his/hers warrants it.

I commute everyday, and in so doing, I pay my fare to the driver. In paying my fare, I extend my hand towards the driver -in hopes that I may reach the driver’s reach. In many instances when my reach falls short, somebody else extends my reach. Hence, somebody’s helping hand. This small gesture – this daily obligation and accustomation of random people, deserves a thank you. Therefore, I say thank you to the person who helped “extend my reach” in the simplest, most genuine way I know. I do not hesitate. I blurt it out, just say it, and give it unselfishly… unflinchingly… because the person needs to hear the freshest thank you from the most recent gust of true thankfulness. The ripest thank you sprouts from the moment the sentiment is first felt.

When I say thank you, I am truly and eternally grateful. I give the best part of the genuineness and sincerity in me. I wonder what more can there be…

I wonder what else a person can give when the best has already  been given…

To some, I figured, thank you in its simplest yet most sincere form is not enough. I wonder, really, whether I should have done something more…

Post on Facebook and drop the name of the person I am indebted to?

Blog about my gratefulness until the feeling is exhausted?

Say Thank you over and over, until I’m spent and drained clear of the sentiment?

Mention that I am utterly and completely beholden to someone, and that I owe my present convenience to that someone?

Lose my dignity and remaining pride and tell the world that I am at the mercy of someone to whom the odds of the world have favored more?

Parade on the streets with confetti raining, to symbolize my “overwhelming gratitude”?

What?

What can one do to satisfy the giver – to make that person feel that I am truly grateful?

This is odd – this questioning and ruminating about my own sincerity, integrity, and honesty of intentions. How could my thank you seem so scant, pathetic, insecure, insincere, and insufficient to someone – after drawing those two words out of ill-supplied wells of humility and honesty? How was the best part of my heart cruelly rejected? How could saying thank you feel so wrong?

Would it have been better if I had not said thank you at all?

Should I have lain prostrate on the floor?

 

I wonder…

 

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